Do your children “live” where they live?

I’m curious how many people allow their children to actually live in their home.

If you come to my house, you will quickly realize that it isn’t spotless. I ask that you be understanding and see that I would rather lay in Chances’ floor reading books with him or CG’s room playing dolls. I grew up where everything had a place and you kept it all together, all the time. My kids? Well, by now you can probably guess that I’m a little more relaxed in that department. Sometimes, I just like to sit and watch them play. Wherever it may be.

If you can’t accept that two little people live here and share their toys with everyone, scattering them through the house, you wouldn’t make good company for us.

Why is it that the kitchen is the one place that can be cleaned 10 times a day and still be dirty? I am 90% finished cleaning our house yet random dishes make their way to the sink and clutter seems to migrate to the kitchen table. Where is it coming from???? I love a clean house, but I absolutely detest giving up time with my kids to clean it!

Legos, doll clothes, and puzzle pieces are among the most popular items this week. It can be challenging finding the balance between allowing your children to play freely and creating boundaries.

Children have their entire lives to have someone stand over them and dictate. I believe in cleanliness and teaching them to cleanup but this is their house. This is their home and they have the right to enjoy it like everyone else. I don’t tell my husband to play games on his phone in our room and practice his “duck calling” in his shed. He doesn’t tell me to read my kindle in our room so why should I confine our children to theirs?

Video

If I could dance with my father again.

Throughout life you will find that as people come and go, some never really leave. I was thirteen years old when he passed away. He was and is still the greatest man I ever knew. My popa. In my mind he was the most honest, loving, and caring person to ever walk the earth. He was my knight in shining armor, my Prince charming, he was my hero. Actually, he still is my hero. He served for his country would have proudly done it again. He spent his days hunting and fishing before diabetes ultimately took his site. We spent our afternoons building things in the shed and making messes for my Nanny to clean up. He may have been set in his ways but I can’t recall a time he ever told me no.

To know him was to love him. He was the first man in my life, and set the bar pretty high for what a man should be. I know most kids enjoy spending time with their grandparents, but he was far more than just a “popa” to me. There was an unspoken bond between the two us. I remember asking one time “how could ever get married?!?!? There will be no dad to give me away!” He gave me this silly face and said “well, I wasn’t going to let just anybody take you off! Figure I’ll meet him first and I might let him have you.” I knew from that moment on, he would fulfill any “daddy duty” we encountered.

Sadly, he never made it to wedding day. To honor him, his photo was with us at the arch my husband and I exchanged our vows under. My actual father and I dedicated the “father-daughter” dance at my wedding to him. It was an extremely emotional moment for everyone, but I know that for every second that passed, he was with me. I was able to dance with home again (so to speak). That was the song played. Today he is weighing heavily on my mind and I hope that everyday since he has passed he’s been proud of who I am and who I am becoming.

 

To my popa, my hero, this one’s for you.

It’s the little people in life.

Sometimes all you need is a little sunshine, a best friend, and a front porch.

After a very busy week filled with a lot of the normal chaos having two children brings, I decided we needed a break from our weekend. Ever notice how time off is never spent “off”? The previous week was jam packed with things to prepare and to catch-up on by the unexpected surgery for Chance and the everyday hustle and bustle of life. After much thought I decided sunshine was what we all really needed. Instead of trying to cram in one more activity or one more event, I grabbed a lawn chair, the kiddy pool, and the sprinkler the kids received at Easter. Moments later I was able to sit back and watch my kids enjoy their water wonderland.

20140519-105256.jpg

The whole memory cost about $15. That’s including the water used for the pool and the sprinkler ($10 of that can’t be counted because the pool is at least two years old). The sheer joy on their faces as the water sparkled in the sunshine was overwhelming. To others passing by it may have looked like a normal Sunday in the sun, but I was enjoying a little piece of heaven on earth. With my phone and all other electronics locked away inside we where able to really enjoy each other. It’s funny how easy it is to connect once you disconnect. The sound of their laughter while splashing each other was far better than any song the radio has to offer. Listening as their imaginations run wild was and is such a blessing to experience. Mermaids, monsters, whales, and boats where the highlights of their adventure in the lost lagoon (kiddy pool). Of course the monster was quickly fed up with the mermaids attemps to ride the whale off into the sunset! Hey, how many siblings do you know that do not disagree from time to time?

I learned a valuable lesson yesterday. It’s not just the little things in life, but the little people in life that make it so enjoyable. My children are my greatest accomplishment, and I spend so much time trying to teach them things or give them something to take with them through life, I fail to see the many things they can teach me. It’s not about the quantity of time we spend with each other but the quality of time. So turn off that smart phone, step away from the t.v.,and enjoy your little people!

Marriage over Media

We see it all the time. News, media, Facebook, and magazines, yet we still haven’t figured it out. These paragraph long articles about how amazing the “hot new couples dinner was at Chez Mega Bucks last night.” You probably missed it again. It’s not about what they’re doing, but about what they’re doing wrong. Ever notice how most magazine covers are either of a new couple or an ugly multimillion dollar divorce? Remember 6 months ago when they where the hot new couple?

Life and marriage aren’t about money, fame, magazine covers, or fairy tales. It’s about finding the person that completes you and holding on to them. Marriage is about creating your own fairy tale. You can’t watch a movie and seriously think that’s how it works. Marriage requires so much more than a frozen TV dinner, and pretty dresses.

Facebook, I keep seeing all these woman belittle an degrade the father of their children. It’s sickening. They are allowing the entire public (or the Facebook friends the have) to see inside every little problem, every crack in their foundation. Then, they have the nerve to say the hate drama. Each time you and your spouse have a problem you don’t change your relationship status to single. You aren’t single, you’re insane, emotionally challenged, and you need help. We need to get off the computer and get back into our relationships.

Start dating your spouse! Whether you choose to go out or stay home with pizza and a movie, set aside time for your spouse. Money can’t buy love. Get to know them. If you think you know them, get to know them better. The only way to build a lasting, loving marriage is to maintain a deep relationship with each other. Sometimes you do need the time apart.

Anticipation makes the heart grow fonder.

use that emotion to grow a stronger relationship.

I’ll end this with my favorite quote:

Anything worth having is worth fighting for.